Day 17 – ‘deja vu’

Today was the day we got my histology results.

Some of you may be familiar with the 1958 British war film classic ‘Ice cold in Alex’

There is a famous scene in the film where our intrepid hero’s are sat at the bottom of the tallest sand dune imaginable in an army ambulance, no matter how hard they try the trusty ambulance gets bogged down every time they attempt to climb it.

Eventually they decide that the only way to get up the dune is back wards, not using the engine but slowly turning the ‘crank handle’, each painful turn slowly advancing the wheel a quarter of a turn. Day and night they take it in turns inching slowly up the dune until they are exhausted,questioning whether it will work, and when will I finish.

Eventually they reach the top, exhausted but thankful that their burden is finally over. Whilst they pause and reflect on what they have achieved out of site the ambulance begins to move, slowly at first, but picking up momentum as it races down and down , the long windy mountainous dune. Eventually it’s rests at the bottom right back where it started.

The group look on, broken and crestfallen.

That’s how we feel tonight, somewhat broken and crestfallen , for me the metaphorical hill to climb is once again intensive chemotherapy, with each cycle akin to that crank of the handle, each time advancing you further but each one draining every last drop of energy from your body.

We were expecting it but it is still daunting nevertheless. We have been here before and we will have to do it again.

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Day 18 – ‘Turning the air blue’

14 Comments

  1. Tracey HoneyC

    Gutted for you both 😞 x onwards and upwards Simon – you can do this xx

  2. Pauline williams

    Non-illegitame carborundum!!!! Don’t let the bastards grind you down!!!!! You’ll get there!!!!! Xxx

  3. Pauline williams

    Just like alex quinn one day you’ll both be sat in a bar drinking ice cold beer and all this will be behind you! Xx

  4. Keep kicking ass – one day at a time guys and remember how much love and support surround you xx

  5. Deborah Maskell

    You are one of the strongest, determined people I know from your blog and meeting once at your sisters funeral. You have an amazing wife and family around you that will be suppprting you every step of the way. Take care of yourself during this tough time but you will come out the other side fighting. Xx

    • Simon

      Many thanks Deborah, it’s a tough gig at times, it the support and live from friends and family is like a giant supportive hand pushing me along

  6. Karen Anderton

    Up and at ‘em Simon! Your blog is so good – can only imagine how helpful it must be for others going through the same as you. Onwards and upwards – you and Ali are an amazing team – Olympic Gold for positive thinking! Much love xxx

  7. Angie Ellis

    You will get there, you are the strongest person ever xx

  8. Cath

    Simon I always read your blog with much trepidation as it is like a roller coaster, one minute you are laughing out loud and the next crying with fear and amazement at your courage but this is the first time of feeling sick. I’m so very sorry to see that chemo Ken is making an unwelcome return. Give the bastard a right good kicking and don’t let him derail your recovery. We need you in our lives and you need to be there at the end of this horrible ride! Xx

    • Simon

      Cath, chemo ken will indeed be making a comeback (regrettably) and along side Little Simon stoma, I shall have my hands full x

  9. Steve Boot

    Dear Simon and Ali. Marie and I are certain we are just a tiny number of the many, many avid followers of your extraordinary blog who haven’t yet commented. We are commenting today so you know there is so much support for you. Let the power of positivity win the day. You are an inspiration. We look forward to celebrating with you when you have beaten this. Let us know if there is anything we can do. Steve and Marie xx

    • Simon

      Steve, my dear friend, how lovely to hear from you . We are bowled over by the support we are receiving, it is truly humbling. We will have a drink, in Jago’s and that’s a promise! Warmest , Simon

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